Better Than Planned

Since I turned the ripe old age of 25, every year around my birthday I think about the past year's accomplishments and failures and reflect on where I thought I would be at that age (e.g., I thought for sure I would have a corporate gig in a high-rise in Chicago by age 25). As I am well past 25 and nowhere near corporate, things haven't exactly turned out as planned. In fact, they're better. And the reason they are better is because I have learned to embrace the unexpected, live simply, and take joy in the little things.

Not that this epiphany happened overnight, mind you. I spent a good part of my mid-20s feeling like an underachiever simply because I didn't have a corner office or a closet full of suits. I spent a lot of time and energy trying to stuff my square peg of a body in a round hole of a plan, only to end up discouraged and bewildered. Then, a couple of years ago, something amazing happened - I was dumped.

You know what it's like to be dumped, feeling heartbroken and lost as if your life is over and you'll never never happiness again. But then you emerge from the darkness to find that your life has actually just begun and that the happiness that lies ahead is far greater than you imagined. Up sprung a string of new friendships, endeavors, and possibilities of which I never before dreamed. The people that came into my life during this time I hold so dear and can't imagine my life without. They once again opened the doors to my creativity and sense of adventure, to laughter and love. You know who you are and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

So last year around my 31st birthday, I again reflected on the past year's triumphs and losses, but instead of dwelling on where I thought I "should" be, I reveled in all that I had experienced. I had cruised the Hawaiian Islands, watched the sun rise from atop a volcano, hiked through waterfalls and canyons and sailed alongside killer whales. I had biked the Golden Gate Bridge and walked the beaches of Lake Michigan in the rain. I had scanned the skyline from atop the Empire State Building, paid my respects at Ground Zero, took a zillion shots of produce at Union Street market and walked the brilliantly lit streets of Times Square. I had danced the moonwalk in a full knee brace, fired my first gun and strummed my first song on the guitar. It was a year of discovery for me but there was so much more I wanted to experience, see and do so I did what I often to - I made a list: "Things I Want to do Before I Turn 32."

Without much thought or precept, I jotted down 21 things I wanted to accomplish before August 2008. From the very silly (make out in a movie theater) to the very serious (contact my dad) to things I had no control over (fall in love), the list encapsulated my wishes, hopes and goals. I posted the list on my myspace blog and never really looked at it again until just before my birthday this year. Below is a copy of the list along with a report on my accomplishments.

1. Make out in a movie theater, in the back row, for at least 3/4 of the movie. This is the most detailed and specific item on the list and the one that started it all. Sparked by a conversation with a friend about making out in the movie theater and the realization that I had never done it (we all know how much I like my movies), I decided I needed to experience this rite of passage. And while I didn't fulfill it entirely, I can tell you that I never saw an entire movie during the months of December and January. And I'll leave it at that...

2. Ask a girl out on a date. Check! The asking took place on December 10, 2007. And, get this, she said yes even though I was lame and asked via text. Luckily she didn't hold it against me.

3. Ask a girl to dance. This one is tricky. Did I walk up to a girl and utter the words "Will you dance with me?" No. Did I ask a girl to show me her Michael Jackson moves in the middle of Buffalo Wild Wings on a Sunday night? Ah yes...

4. Learn to play the guitar and play the songs I write. Check! Ok, so I haven't picked up my guitar all summer but I know more than three chords now (at least five or six) and I did write a couple of songs, one of them even has some semblance of a melody. I also added three serenades to my repertoire including a rousing rendition of Blowing in the Wind.

5. Skydive. Not yet. But it's on the horizon...

6. Paint something worth hanging. Check! Two of my paintings will be displayed in my new apartment. One because I think it is good enough, the other because I painted it more with my heart than with my hands.

7. Complete an adventure race. This goal has been replaced with a mini triathlon at Disney World in May 2009. Now I just have to learn how to swim...

8. Contact my dad. Not yet. And in the words of Forrest Gump, "That's all I have to say about that..."

9. Enter a photography contest. I haven't taken any action on this one but I would like to. If anyone knows of any amateur contests, please pass along the info. I have a whole slew of produce shots that are worth at least an honorable mention.

10. Take a girl on a picnic. Not exactly, but we did eat our dinner watching the sun set around our campfire while the Mackinac Bridge twinkled in the distance and fireworks spouted all around us. How's that for a close second?

11. Buy a kayak. No kayak buying is in my foreseeable future so for now I will continue to support my local liveries by renting them.

12. Buy a bike. Check! It's green. It's fast. I like it.

13. Make amends with an ex. I put this on the list because I don't like to have negative energy in my life especially when it comes to relationships - of any kind. It's a work in progress but I'm happy to say that I have found peace with the past.

14. Take my mom to see Wicked. Check! I cheated a little bit because I took her three days after my birthday but it was a delight and a treat and a day I'll never forget. "Toss, toss."

15. Learn to meditate and do it on a regular basis. Check! With the help of my yoga practice and an introduction to meditation from a friend, I have a much better grasp of the art but, in truth, I do not practice it as often as I would like. We have deemed the second bedroom as the Office/Meditation Room, however, and I was looking at pillows at World Market just yesterday. Again, it's a process.

16. Climb a real rock. By a "real rock" I was referring to climbing outside in the elements and I can safely say that this is something I will not likely pursue with gusto. I rather like the controlled environment, padded floors and pumping...uh...rock music at Planet Rock. Belay on!

17. Learn to ice skate. In progress. And kind of a requirement for playing hockey. Can't wait to get baked. Or my skates baked. Whatever!

18. Take an improv class. Not yet. Maybe I can fit it in during my copious amounts of free time this Fall in between volleyball, softball, and hockey. And writing this blog. And playing the guitar. And learning how to swim. And...

19. Go to Oregon. Sigh...still very high on the list of places I want to go, right up there with New Zealand and slightly more affordable.

20. Fall in love. Check! And here is where I could do one of two things - I could go on and on gushing about the wonderful, amazing woman in my life or I could go on and on gushing about the wonderful, amazing power of lists. I will do neither of those things now, but look for them in future posts.

21. Find a freelance copywriting gig. Ah, I knew there was a reason I started this blog...